The King's Heart
The king’s heart is in the hand of the LORD, as the rivers of
water: he turneth it whithersoever he will.
Proverbs 21:1
Dear sister,
Whether you are a daughter or a wife, this verse is for you! Even if you are a daughter or wife of a father or husband who is not walking in God’s design for him as a leader in your home … believe that if you are walking in God’s design for you as a daughter/wife, He has the heart of your leader and He turns it wherever He will.
Rejoice, and be exceeding glad that God has all things taken care of for you. Walk in the grace that He provides for you to love your leader without being a nagging, quarrelsome woman, or one sick with worry over what isn’t right and how that will work out for you. Pray about those things, those cares about the things in your home that do not match God’s heartbeat for you. Walk in the light of truth He brings for you and leave the rest to Him. He is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we can ask or think. Ep. 3:20
Remember, you are never alone! Even though it is a lonely thing to walk before God without the support and leadership of father/husband, it is possible to walk with Him in power and peace because He honors those who honor Him. Mt. 10:32
If you long for your husband/father to walk in active faithful obedience and relationship with God, and you see before you many wasted years because he hasn’t made this his life’s priority, PRAY for that man. Walk with God yourself and pray for that man! According to Peter, your faithful example and walk with the Lord can win Him to the Lord without nagging and angry bitterness. 1 Pe. 3:1-2
Love the father/husband God placed over you. Look for ways to bless him every day. Find out what he likes and then bless him in those areas. Don’t force your way in where he doesn’t want you to be (i.e. spiritual discussions, debates, etc). God has promised to perfect that which concerns you. Ps. 138:8 Believe that promise as well; God never lies and He never forsakes His own. Nu. 3:19
Let these times of waiting be times of sanctifying your own heart. The waiting can be a wonderful blessing as you draw close to the Lord and let Him purify you and grow your roots strong and sure in His word. He wants to see His reflection more perfectly in the gold of your life. Jb. 23:10 Let the dross of your own heart fall away and walk in the new life Jesus gives all those who put their trust in him. Ro. 6
Here are some practical ways to bless a husband/father in any walk of his life, but especially if he is walking in spiritual darkness or apathy, and your heart is bleeding for him to rise up and know Jesus and live the vibrant life, full of the Holy Ghost:
- Love to tend to his physical needs. It is hard work to be the breadwinner and the provider, to go out every day, away from the haven that is home, and work to provide for the family. Make sure he is fed nourishing, tasteful meals. Keep his clothes clean and presentable.
- Make your home a haven of peace. Do what you must (downsize possessions, stay home every day, etc) to be that keeper of the home God designed you to be. A well decorated home does not need to be time-consuming. Simple beauty is much easier to keep clean and tended. Put being a keeper of the home on the top of your to-do list. Learn to love filling this God-designed role for you.
- Walk daily with your Savior so that you will be a peaceful, happy woman to be around. Fill your home with singing and peaceful conversations. Ask the Lord how to be that kind of woman, despite the sorrow that fills your heart at times if you live with a husband/father who is shirking his duty before the Lord. He is able to do much more than you can ask or think. He is able to give you power to create a haven of peace for your husband/father to come home to every night when he is done laboring in the work world.
- Be observant. Is there something that your husband/father would like to get done but is too busy to do so? Maybe he usually sweeps out the garage, but he’s been extra busy this week and tired from working extra hard. Maybe you can find some time today to do that for him. Or maybe he has a pile of wood he cut for the stove and it needs to be stacked. Can you lay aside the half hour you were going to read and stack the wood instead?
- If you have siblings/children, get them involved. Show them how to bless the head the Lord has given them. Show them how to cheerfully walk in the design God has for them and you.
Above all, remember the words of 1 Corinthians 10:31: “Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.”
When we are doing things for the honor and glory of God, we will not go wrong!
Yes, in reality, it can be a hard thing to live with a husband/father who is not living in His God-designed place of leadership. There will be loneliness, tears, and perhaps a strong desire to ‘put him in his place.’ There will be a never-ending desire to have him step up to the plate (some of that is God-placed in a woman’s heart; it just needs to stay there and not be taken out of its rightful place) and walk in God’s design as a father and husband in your home. The way will be steep and rugged. But the way of the cross (denying ourselves and choosing Jesus’ way) leads home.
May women everywhere lift up holy hands to heaven in prayer for their husbands, in whatever way they are choosing to live their lives.
May we walk in the design God has given us and live our lives to the praise of Jesus Christ ... for the revival of homes, for the honor of God, for the sake of growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ by the power of the Holy Spirit He has sent to guide us into all truth.
Love, Your sister in Jesus ... because I care. ~
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